Monday, June 6, 2011

Unexpected God moment

Monday May 30th

So I stuck with 20 minutes again this week.  I am just not feeling confident in my shins.  I am still struggling with a lot of pain.  It was memorial day today, so I didn't get up in the morning.  I did get out for my run today during nap time.  It was a good day.  After my run yesterday, I thought for sure I was going to be in for a rough one.  However,  I actually felt pretty good.  My legs were no where near as heavy as yesterday, and overall I felt pretty good.  My prayers as of late have all been prayed for my dad.  He has really been on my mind.  He has a Dr appointment tomorrow, and they are going to biopsy a lump that has gotten increasingly bigger over the last two months.  My dad has several other health problems, and the thought of him having cancer on top of it is worrisome to say the least.  So as I was running today, I prayed especially for my dad to find his way to God in all of this.  My dad has had a hard life, and I am proud of him.  Not all people could live through the things my dad has and still have a good heart.  He does.  I just so badly want him to know that he is loved in a way most of us can not even fully comprehend.  My prayer is that he truly feels Gods love in all of this.  He has started going to church again,  which is  a great step for him.  So as I ran and prayed, I began to feel some peace.  I am really savoring my prayer/running time.  It is so good for a perspective check for me.

Tuesday May 31st.

Windy was not even an accurate description of the weather today.  HOLY COW!  It was crazy.  I didn't make it up in the morning, but I met my friend Jill at the track in the afternoon.  As we were doing our warm-up lap,  we joked about standing in place as we were attempting to run in the wind.  I told Jill that as hard as it was going to be, I was doing this run for my dad.  So off we went.  As I was rounding the track to face the wind on my  first lap, I looked up and saw a bird flying,  and it looked as if it was flying in place.  The wind was so strong!  So I put my head down and started praying.  I went barrelling into the wind.  I'm sure it looked like I was hardly moving as well, but I pushed hard.  My prayers were really focused today, which is good.  I think it helped knowing Jill was united in prayer with me for my dad.  You would think that running into the wind would have dampered my focus, but it made it stronger.  I had a mission, I would push through the wind and do my best to keep my normal pace.  I actually felt good running into the wind.  I felt strong, like nothing could stop me.  I made up my mind, and I would beat the Wind.  It probably sounds silly, but I love it when I am able to focus like that.  It does not come easily for me.  I am a very distracted person.  I usually can not complete a full thought with out being interrupted in my daily life.  With Children around me 24/7 I have learned to cope with constant interruptions.  Nothing ever goes as planned.  So when I am able to  focus and one thing and just get it done.  It is exciting for me.  I always feel like I've accomplished something great!  Today was a good day, and I felt peaceful after my run.

Wednesday June 1

I didn't make it out of bed this am.  I am having a tough time getting up this week!  I also did not make it to the track this evening.  We had an event at church tonight.  So I decided today would be my day off.

Thursday June 2.

I knew I had to get up in the morning today, because we were leaving right after work today to head back to Sioux Falls.   My dad's brother (Uncle Chuck) was coming for a visit on Friday.  The last time I saw my uncle was when I was a fifth Grader!  It was important to my dad that I be there, so I took Friday off work and planned to head back to Montrose.    I however, must not have set my alarm, because I woke up at 715am.  It was also my kids last day of school today.  So I spent the day packing and getting us ready to go.  My oldest three are staying with Grandma for a week,  so I had Needless to say I did not get any exercise in today.

Friday June 3rd

We got in to Sioux Falls last night around 1130pm.  Then Steve and I stayed up visiting with his parents until130am visiting.  Sarah then was up from 330 am to -530 am, and then back up at 730 for the day.  I was tired!  I knew I absolutely had to run today, and we were leaving for my parents farm by noon.  I told Steve to sleep in, because we had to head back to Fergus Falls late tonight, because he was running the half-marathon, and I was running the 5k in Fergus falls in the morning.  My parents live about 35 minutes from Sioux we had a busy day with a LOT of driving. Steve's mom said she would watch the kids so I could go for my run.  It took me like an hour to actually get out of the house.  So I walked to the Edison Junior High track as my warm-up.  When I got to the track I noticed there was another person running,  my initial thought was oh no, some one will see how slow I am.  She was about 200m ahead of me when I started running.  I decided not to worry about how slow I was, and just do my run.  I started my prayers and away I went.  About half way into my run, I noticed this gal had stopped running and was walking.  As I caught up to her she said Hi, and I said Hi back.  She then started running with me.  She told me how nice it was to see someone running without headphones in.  I told her that I like to pray when I run, so I usually don't have any music going.....its my quiet time.  She then asked you are a believer huh?  I shared I was.  At this point she just started opening up to me about her struggles with her son, who has a drinking problem.  I listened and prayed for her as she spoke.  I have plenty of experience with alcoholism in my life.  My dad is an alcoholic, and my brother-in-law is as well.   I've seen years of drinking take it's toll on both of them, and I have seen both of them begin to recover.  My dad has recovered and relapsed many times in his life.  So I thought maybe God would want me to share some of my insights into the disease and living with it.  However, as I listened and prayed for her, God placed on my heart to  instead share the Story of my youngest daughter Sarah.  About nine months ago  Sarah had a severe Febrile Seizure.  It lasted for an hour and a half.  It took the ambulance about ten minutes to get to our house, and by this time her lips were turning blue.  I have never been so scared in my life!  We got her to the hospital, and the doctors worked crazy to get the seizing to stop, and they look as worried as you do, you know it is bad.  I knew immediately that we had to get the anointing of this sick done for Sarah.  Steve called are priest and he came and did the anointing.  As he finished the prayer,  her eyes opened for the first time since the whole episode started.  Even after that miracle, I shared with how I struggled with trusting.  I was neurotic,  taking her to the doctor all the time.  She was having terrible night terrors,  I was awake for two to three hours a night with her screaming.  I would never leave her.  I was so afraid she would have another seizure.  Then the Friday before thanksgiving....she did.  I took her to the Dr that morning, cause she had a low grade temp, he said it was viral, we came home and layed her down for nap.  Midway through her nap, I heard this terrible noise, from her and went running into her room and she was seizing.  I put her in the car and took off for the Dr's office.  Shortly after that, we had our house blessed, and I got to a point where I was so tired and was really a shell of me, because I wasn't sleeping, and all I did was worry.  I sat in a chair one afternoon, and sobbed.  I was talking with Jesus, and for the first time since this happened, I gave Sarah over to him.  I told him I knew I could not protect her, and that I had to trust him to take care of her.  I shared with her the prayer I say every night when I lay Sarah down.  "Mother Mary,  please hold my baby in your arms, while I can not."  Sarah has no longer had night terrors, and has not had another seizure since, despite several fevers.  When I got done telling her my story, she had tears in her eyes, and told me that was just what she needed to hear, and how she struggles with not trying to control everything in her sons life.   By this time we were don running and had walked a cool down lap.   I asked her if I could pray with her before we left.  We prayed, hugged, and went our separate ways.  I am just in awe,  you never know who God brings in and out of your life at the times you may need it the most.  I by sharing my struggles, was able to help someone else.  I was also solidified in my faith, by having that sharing.  It reminded me of all the blessings daily, that we take for granted, and how we should never stop being grateful.  God is Good.

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